Healing Archives

Y -Yield to Positivity

Posted on July 1, 2020September 28, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

Isn’t it interesting how we can get so bogged down with life at times, that we share our difficult moments with others and yet learn how misery really does love company? It is a gift to be able to share life with friends but rarely do people share the good things in life and push each other to be better; this is because sharing the storms in life can be much easier than spreading positivity.

What if when we experienced difficulties, we were able to share the positive possibilities and be surrounded by rays of light in people who align with the vision that we have for ourselves? That would be a much better world to live in, wouldn’t it?

Allowing the weight of our despair to take over our minds and hearts hurts a lot more when we are unable to yield to a remnant of positivity. The strength that we can create in our minds starts with working diligently to find a bit of light when the storms roll in.

Going through a struggle may be an easier ride, but it would be much more beneficial to gift yourself with a bumpy ride that arrives at positivity from time-to-time. When we can take the time to consistently feed our despair a switch of the mind and shift ourselves into positivity gear, we find that life if is a little easier if and when can alter our views. Give yourself the gift of yielding to positivity and know that you do not have to linger in difficult days.

Bible & Spiritual Connection
2 Corinthians 4:8-9
You are a vessel carrying what you need to reach your destiny, so why not fill that vessel with positivity whenever possible. If you ever feel like you cannot reach that source of positivity look up and inside of yourself. Don’t block out the light, you never know when you may need it.
James 1:2-4
You have the power to find your joy no matter what you face. Surely it takes effort to be steadfast, but the reward is great. Keep strong to your faith and no that from every trial there is a lesson to be learned. Be overjoyed that you can still see the light and feel some sense of peace when you can yield to positivity and cast your worries aside.

Be blessed and be at peace.
#KayLasPositivityCorner

Dear Black Kings

Posted on June 12, 2020September 28, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

Dear Black Kings

Dear Black Kings, lean on your Queens.

Know that we know life is harder than it may seem.

We see your worries and feel your pain.

We know that a heavy heart can drive you insane.

We never want you to feel alone,

So feel and see that we are with you in the heat of the zone.

A part of our world may need mending,

But we need your truths to always be ascending.

Even if the road gets rough and your tears do fall,

Your Queen will always be there to pick up the ball.

Give me your hand and tag me in,

In this life, together, we can win.

I carry your heart and you hold mine

With each other, we will yet again see the sun shine.

I’ll wear my crown while we shine yours,

I’ll pray over you and you’ll become you once more.

Strength and courage of a lion and lioness

We will overcome challenges that bring us stress.

We’ll get through dark days with love, know that this is true.

This life together is to be conquered and it’s all possible with me AND you.

Signed, his Black Queen.

The Endless Pandemic of the Evil Plague

Posted on May 29, 2020September 28, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

The Endless Pandemic of the Evil Plague

Hearts cry and break from the pain of the ended lives and partial blame

While leaders find that their behavior is not to be shamed.

Mothers live in fear simply because their baby boys have brown skin

While black and brown men house anger, disappointment, and fear from within.

The KKK comes out during the day and posts ads in the paper by night

Real changes are nowhere in sight.

Years of hate taught to children and the masses,

Yet no one can teach evil-doers, hate-free classes.

Murders and ill-will run rampant and justice turn a cheek

All while families lose their loved ones every week.

Sister, I hear your cries and I feel your pain,

No good life should be ended – slain.

Lift your voices and march in the streets,

Tread with power, truth, and history wrapped around your feet.

We will not be silenced today or tomorrow

We will not live our lives in never-ending sorrow.

Let us find the cure and give the vaccine for free.

Let us flatten this curve forever and let all people just be.

A word, hug, prayer, or termination of a job will not be enough,

From all this, our worries will thrive, and our skin will only grow tough.

We need a resolution and we need it to last;

The end of hate and brutality is something we need to happen fast.

Abrupt actions and ego will not impart

The greatness that is needed (it starts in the heart).

Democrat, Republican, Undeclared, Left, or Right,

None of these matters if compassion for ALL people is not the real fight.

Hear me now, loud, and clear,

I WILL NOT LIVE MY LIFE IN FEAR!

We can stop this pandemic and end foolish pride

When we can finally put all our differences aside.

-KayLa N. Allen, MPH (A Proud Brown/Black Woman)

Q – Query or Lesson

Posted on May 6, 2020September 24, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

There are times that arise when a situation stumps us and we do not know what to do to overcome it. This is surely a time of great reflection, meditation, prayer, and necessary visualization. On another end of the spectrum, it is equally a time to decide the situation means to you (at your core).

One situation that I have encountered is in dealing with difficulties within the school setting and not having adequate support that I think I need in order to perform well. Yes, in difficult moments, we can get angry, fuss, cuss, and yell…but is that enough to give us the answers and the vision that we need to take what happened and turn it into something fruitful?

When the road gets rough, the thing to consider is whether what is happening is a time for a query or a needed lesson.

Even when we think that we are wise and intellectual, there is yet still something to be learned. These queries may stimulate our growth and the lessons that you may need to let could set you apart from others at every level. When reached for what you can learn from queries or lessons will change your life in the way that you allow them to.

Think clearly. Be patient with yourself. Take the time to understand beyond the surface what you need to learn, especially when you are facing trials in your life.

Bible & Spiritual Connection
Proverbs 1:5 & 1 Thessalonians 5:11
There are countless lessons to be learned in life, but it is important to remember the value that they hold and that in your journey toward seeking sound knowledge God is present. No one walks this road alone, so do not be afraid to ask questions or learn the lesson that you need to learn.

Z – Zero to Infinity

Posted on October 1, 2019September 24, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

All things must start somewhere.

No matter the turmoil of your past, you can start from your own “ground zero”.

Overcoming any situation is only one of the tough parts of evolving. You must also be able to handle any thoughts, consequences, and circumstances that may arise in connection to the past.

All good houses must start with a foundation, so we can treat the next phase of life as the foundation building phase.

In this phase, you must grow and fight the good fight.

No one can jump from phase zero to infinity without a lot of effort in between. Even those who may seem to skip phases must go through times of learning and growth.

To climb a mountain you don’t start at the bottom, blink your eyes, and arrive at the top, right? So, in your life don’t expect things to happen that way either.

Be healthy in your growth. Allow yourself to experience what comes with it.
Treat yourself kindly. This means you have to do what it takes to eliminate doubt, prevent self-destruction, and pace yourself throughout your journey.

Understand and respect that you are nothing like you used to be. People of the past don’t need to “know” the new you. Don’t allow anyone to “make you” become/act like you used to. Don’t go back in time to connect to people or comfortable circumstances; it will only hurt you.

We all have the chance to go from zero to infinity.

Is the journey worth it? What if you put in the work and become successful?
On the other hand, what if you looked back 10 years from now and you weren’t making the progress that you could have been? How would that make you feel?

Dream big, but also take the steps to match up with what you are wanting to experience in the physical realm.

My zero may have been brokenness, trauma, and pain, but my infinity will be true joy, success, and constant evolution.

Habbakuk 2:3
“For the revelation awaits for an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it lingers, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.” Your greatness is coming, even though you may not be able to see it yet. Keep working, evolving, and know that you are not alone in your journey. In His timing, things will happen. Be patient.

Psalms 138:8
“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands.” Isn’t it beautiful to know that God is forever and His love is forever? If you know that He is on your team, you must also know that he will guide you, provide, support, love, and encourage you all the way through if you invite Him in and truly allow Him to do so.

***Health Spotlight***
Zygomycosis/Mucormycosis (a fungus)

Symptoms: can vary depending on where the fungus is; headache, congestion, one side facial swelling, black lesions inside of the mouth, fever, cough, chest pain, abdominal, nausea, and gastrointestinal bleeding
Prevalence: rare; no national surveillance on this.
Treatment: prescription medication or surgery if necessary.
Prevention: People who are at risk are commonly those who take medication that weakens immune systems. People need to protect themselves from the environment including areas with heavy dust, water damage, and gardening/outdoor areas; wear a mask, long sleeve shirt, and gloves.

Be blessed and be at peace.
#KayLasPositivityCorner

T – Time by the Moment

Posted on June 23, 2019September 24, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

Time will never stop passing and you will never have 100% control of the seconds that keep ticking by.

Past:
Your experiences came with lessons, some good some bad. However you choose to look at it, you can’t help but to know that you found truths and wisdom in what you learned.

You can take the time to cry and release whatever you faced. No one can judge you for that. In truth, that may be exactly what you need to move forward.

Crying from the heart and soul brings the mind clarity.

Present:
Although the present can seem difficult or overwhelming, one of the most important things that you can do is continue to fight. One swing at a time. One step at a time. You must keep pushing and understand the value of this very moment.

As you must with a fruiting tree, you have to first plant a seed into your mental garden before you can grow.

Future:
The future can be whatever make it out to be. How you use the lessons of your past and appreciate the “gift” of your present will determine how successful, fulfilled, and happy you will be in your future.

Every step of your journey will look different and that is a good thing. This is because with every new step you grow and evolve.

When was the last time that you thought about a previous space of emptiness? If you are taking more than a few seconds to remember, stop and do it right now. Remember those feelings, but pay attention to how far you have come.

Ecclesiastes 3:11
“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from the beginning to end.” Mind your steps and know that your efforts will bring forth a beauty that is beyond your wildest dreams.

Proverbs 21:5
“The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty.” Your present, this very moment, if you aren’t doing anything to get to where you want to be, it won’t happen. You must be active in making your dream a reality. God has given you the tools that you need, but you have to put in your own effort.

What you want in your life is not bound, in fact you have the opportunity to truly live a limitless life. The Universe is working in your favor. God sees all that you work hard for and He knows what you need and deserve.

Learn from your past, work hard and have faith in your present, and live the best future!

***Health Spotlight***
Trichinellosis (also known as Trichinosis) – CDC
https://www.cdc.gov/parasites/trichinellosis/

This disease can being harmful. It is contracted by eating raw or uncooked meat from an animal that has a tiny parasite called Trichinella.
Hogs raised outdoor that may come in close contact with rodents and other wildlife have a higher risk of becoming infected.
Across the world there are approximately 10,000 cases annually.
To treat Trichinella, there are safe prescription drugs.In prevention, make sure that you cook meat to safe temperatures, wash your hands thoroughly when handling raw meat, clean any areas that come in contact with raw meat, and do your research if you need specifics on handling, storage, or cleaning.

Be blessed and be at peace.
#KayLasPositivityCorner

Achievement, Changes, Determination, Development, Empowerment, Epidemiology, Global Health, God, Healing, Law of Attraction, Manifest, Public Health, Self-Love, Timing, mental health,

M- Meditate to Mediate

Posted on March 27, 2019September 24, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

When you are panning through different areas of concern in your life or trying to understand how to get from one level to the next, one of the most important things to do is to see it all happening.

Start with a dream or vision and make it real by allowing it to come into reality within your mind.

You start a mental race inside of yourself when you first dream up anything that you want in life.

Just like anything else you have to put a strong focus on the effort and begin to work on it within your mind to make it all happen.

Teach yourself to meditate on whatever area that you are trying to grow into. I meditate with guided meditation and/or music to get in tune with myself, align my chakras, and grow into new spaces. You don’t have to do formal cross your legs and say “Ohm” meditating to get in tune; the most important aspect is to focus on one area of concern.

Not to sound cocky or anything, but some of the greatest answers can come from inside of you. You shouldn’t invite everyone to your mental table, because you may be served a dish that you cannot digest or that may bring you more harm than good.

When you invite people into your space it can be quite difficult to hear the truth and what you should do, as words of advice can biased, filled with judgment, or not helpful in your life.

What you zone into within yourself will contribute to whatever you are experiencing. To use myself as an example, I have had to sit with my thoughts about school and my future career; I know that only me and God can push the effort, so I talk to God in length at absolute minimum twice a day.

In prayer or meditation you go in seeking truth and answers; if you are truly listening beyond the realms of your heart and you become fervent in your practice you will receive direct and clear answers. Teach yourself to go from meditation or prayer warrior to conqueror and achiever.

One of my favorite things to do is step into nature and simply feel the air; this is another space for getting in tune with myself and spending alone time with God.

When you meditate to mediate you can reach answers and spaces that you could not have even imagined prior to entering that time.

Let’s talk a look at a couple of bible verses to truly reel this in.

Isaiah 26:3
“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” If we live knowing that God is wanting us to train our mind, strengthen our focus and maintain clarity in what He wants us to do, why shouldn’t we be fixing our eyes on Him especially in prayer and meditation. Those times of silence/focus are a way of calling God directly as asking Him to speak to our hearts. In our silence we can hear clearly as we are free of distractions, and get closer to higher powers and/or more in tune with the Universal callings.

Psalms 49:3
“My mouth will speak words of wisdom; the meditation of my heart will give you understanding.” This is one of my favorite verses! If you are teaching yourself through reading, prayer, and wise counsel how to walk in your purpose giving God the glory all the way through, guess what will loosen-YOUR BLESSINGS! Meditation is a form of prayer, so take the time to make it a priority and do it regularly.

No matter what you are facing it is so important to see good things happening, encourage yourself through and through, and be thankful in the good and bad times. Remember that giants do fall! The enemy and/or the devil is lingering and wants to take over, so speak against that and fight for what you want. Wipe away your tears, pray, meditate and believe that God/the Universe is working in your favor. Meditate to mediate and watch how things start become as clear as ever.

Be blessed and be at peace.
#KayLasPositivityCorner

***Health Spotlight***
Mental Health
Millions of people face and/or live with mental health concerns that affect their everyday lives. Whether it is you, a friend, loved one, or someone that you consider an acquaintance, it is important to understand exactly what they are facing and how it may be intertwined with their lives. Listen to concerns; mental health concerns are not always exposed in a physical sense, so be kind, respectful and understanding if someone you know is living with any type of mental condition. Be a good listener, do not laugh at someone because of how tough of a time that they may be having, and do whatever you can to help them. Help loved one find resources that can help them live their best lives and remember that mental health issues are a major concern that can be addressed at many levels. Let us all be there for each other, become well-educated on mental concerns, and support one another in whatever we may be facing. Meditate, seek help, and pray about what you may be facing and know that there are many people that care about you and will whatever they can to help you. I’m praying for you and I can give you guidance on where to turn if you need any time of health assistance.

Achievement, Challenges, Empowerment, Evolution, Global Health, Goals, Guidance, Healing, Holistic Health, Mindfulness, Positivity, Public Health, Strength, Vision, Wisdom, Epidemiology, Mental Health, Prayer, Meditation

L-Lament, Don’t Forever Linger

Posted on March 17, 2019September 24, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

Lamenting can happen and be a part of many times in life, working to process any form of sorrow is the only way to see brighter days. I want you to understand and know that no matter how you feel when something truly tears at your heart that it is okay to express those emotions. You must allow yourself to cry, scream, and let it go at your own pace; no one can force you and no one can tell you that you are not allowed to experience emotions or feelings of lament.

Relationships
Whether we are speaking about a loss or a relationship (friend or family) that you must break away from, memories last a lifetime and no one can tell you how or when to heal. There is such beauty in connecting and bonding with someone that truly cares about you. Breaking away is never easy. I will pray for you and encourage you to do whatever you can to find your peace.

In grieving a deep loss, you know what you need to heal; you know if or when you want to talk, if or when you want to get out of the bed, with who or where you want to go. You will never just get over it, I know this from experience; don’t ever let anyone tell you that you have to move on. I know that your heart feels like it has literally left your body, and I am so sorry that you are hurting. I promise you that “better” and “easier” days are coming.

Inner Brokenness
No matter the source of what may have brought you to the space of brokenness that you may be in, a challenge is always finding the light or any space of positivity; it is okay to go through this patch of time. You are human and I get it; I have felt how are feeling before.

How it Feels to be Stuck

Feeling stuck in your sorrow, pain, hurts, and disappointment is stifling. It can make you feel empty, lonely, and hopeless. Cemented takes on a whole new meaning when your mind gives you the feeling of being stuck in a situation, place, or frame of thinking.

When to Move On and/or Move Forward
Your timing is your choice, however when something inside of you speaks and says that you need to move forward maybe you should listen. This does not mean that you erase everything, color your hair and change your name; it does not have to be that drastic. It can mean that you make one small change or one new effort to reclaim your happiness. You have to listen to your heart, mind, and soul.

Letting Go Is Freeing
“Letting Go” of your pain, as you see fit and in the way that you deserve can give you a freedom unlike any other. It is like taking the chains off that have been binding you. You will slowly but surely start to feel lighter; the weight of pain or sadness can be unbearable.

Lament is real and all of us experience it at some point in life, the challenge is always climbing out the rubble. I want you to own your emotions, allow yourself to feel whatever it is that you feel, but do what you can to not clutch onto that pain forever. Push through the pain when you can but promise yourself and show yourself that you deserve happiness and peace that you can only find within yourself.

Pray without ceasing; when you are experiencing lament, it is a time to cling to what you know best and that is the love of the Lord, your connection to whatever higher power, or your belief in the will of the Universe. God is always present and even when no one else can understand at the deepest level of your pain, He can and does; so ask Him to help you through it and to help guide you on the path to a new normal and a new realm of happiness.

Think of how many cried out in lament to God in the Bible…
Psalms 130:1-2
“Out of the depths I cry to you, Lord; Lord hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy.” Cry out to God. Pray out loud. Go into your prayer closet, no one can judge you on that. I promise that God will hear you and respond according to His will (in His way and time, not yours).

Jeremiah 15:18
“Why is my pain unending and my wound grievous and incurable? You are to me like a deceptive brook, like a spring that fails.” Many people have gone through a time of brokenness or loss of faith…some have even grown angry with God, but even those in Bible times quickly learned the reasons why God does what He does. They learned God teaches lessons, shapes paths, delivers, provides and protects – he will, has always, and is (right now) doing the same for you.

Even Jesus questioned God’s will and actions in the use of the words previously spoken by David (Psalms 22):
“My God, my God why have you forsaken me?” You are not the only one who wants to understand/be understood, wants guidance, and needs clarity – do not be ashamed to ask. He is your Father and he loves you.

You have been given three of examples of people that cried out to God, sought and answer, bore agony, saw loss, faced death and wars and felt immense pain. What you need to remember in your lament is that your pain will not last forever…you hold the key to your peace and happiness and God always saves.

Jeremiah 15:21
“I will save you from the hands of the wicked and deliver you from the grasp of the cruel.”

You see! God promises and shows that he cares and understands over and over again. If He has saved and cared for so many before, don’t you know that He is going to do the same for you?!

Your challenge is to pray, have faith, and try your best to find inner happiness; I don’t care what that looks like whether it is taking up piano, violin, or guitar lessons, joining a cycling class, or enjoying small moments of peace by painting via color by number…if it brings you true happiness and is healthy to your mind, body, and soul, please do it.

You are allowed to feel pain, you are allowed to take your time to understand what has happened or is happening, just don’t make or allow that pain (to) alter all that you are. You still deserve to have moments of happiness and to experience pure joy, right? So do what it takes to make that happen, when you are ready. Lament, pray, and do a happiness reach forward; don’t sit in alone forever my dear. Better days are truly coming, I promise.

Truly seek positivity and light, you won’t regret it.

***Health Spotlight***
Lyme Disease – a tick-borne disease found globallySymptoms: fever, headache, fatigue, and a skin rash are common. If left untreated – facial paralysis and arthritis are possible.
Prevalence: approx. 30,000 cases a year in US
Treatment: Antibiotics (oral or IV depending on the patient)
Prevention: Know where to expect ticks (they live in grass, brush, wooded areas and on animals), treat clothing and gear with products containing 0.5% permethrin, use EPA registered repellents, avoid contact with ticks, and check clothing and skin when returning indoors.

Your health is your own to manage, your family’s health is your responsibility, your community’s health is connected to your local leaders, global health is connected to government officials; you see, in some way we all need each other. If you are doing your very best to help yourself and your family then in one way, you are helping many others. Do not wait in your physical pain to get it help, it could be detrimental to your health.

Be blessed and be at peace.
#KayLasPositivityCorner

Empowerment, Global Health, Public Health, Mental Health, Holistic Health, Epidemiology, Mindfulness, Law of Attraction, Grieving, Bereavement, Positivity, Light, Challenges, Loss, Faith, Healing, Universe, God

Overcoming Abuse

Posted on August 29, 2018September 24, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

This is one that truly hits home for me, as I endured physical and mental abuse in my past. I saw this blog as an opportunity to be completely open and vulnerable with you. I know that you may be experiencing this now, or may be moving beyond that pain and I am going to give you some insight, love, and support during this time.

Feeling pain from physical abuse, mental/emotional abuse, or verbal abuse can hurt and plague your life with stress, anxiety, depression, and countless triggers. I know your pain and I know your feelings, and I want to help you get through it and help you take back your life.

If you are still in an abusive relationship/friendship or in a seemingly abuse work relationship, you need to take inventory on your life.

Abusive Personal Relationships
Intimate: Although a person may say that they did not mean it or it will not happen again, remember that it should not have happened at all. Don’t let them take you out of character or make you change your view of yourself. Remember that you are made in God’s image and you can be anything that you want to be in life; don’t let anyone’s thoughts/behaviors hold you hostage. If someone says that no one else will want you, remember that there are billions of other people in the world and if you were only meant to be with one person you would have been assigned them/physically connected to them at birth. You are handsome/You are beautiful and there are many others who would feel lucky to have someone like you to love because of all that you have to offer (internally) and your wonderful spirit.

People that hurt us with no remorse, do not need to be in our lives. Fight back in whatever way you can to leave; analyze your situation and be prepared to leave safely. Call the police and report it. If you have a friend/family member you can trust have them help you move out. I promise, no matter how much your partner may pull you away from your family/friends someone still cares and loves you.

A person should not speak negatively to you: yelling at you, cursing at you, calling you out of your name, etc. If your significant other is showing you signs of a high temper, uncontrollable anger/behavior, pay attention and know that you cannot change someone who does not see a problem with what they are doing. Even if they say that it is not their normal behavior and they do not know where it came from, know that their words are more than likely not the truth. Anger doesn’t come out of nowhere, nor does abuse. Being under the influence is not an excuse, either. Pay attention and believe what you are shown.

Be mindful of patterns.

Never forget: You did not make them do it.

There are foundations, organizations, shelters, etc. to support you if you need it. If you need help finding one, let me know and I will assist you in every way humanly possible. I care and I want to help you.

Friends
Yes, friends can abuse you. If they make fun of you “jokingly”, use you, only call when they need something, take and never give, etc. they do not need to be in your life. People will only do what they are allowed to do. If your “friend” is only there for selfish reasons, show them the nearest exit. Stand up for yourself and demand what you deserve or leave if it is not within your friendship. Be kind and still pay attention; do not be blinded by history or false sense of friendship.

Work
If your superiors/coworkers are using you for their benefit and do not support you, encourage you, offer you room for growth, etc. you may not belong there. You have to realize that you have special gifts and talents that you can offer the team/business and those gifts have a significant value.

Do not let others misuse you, abuse you, cause you pain, break your spirit, degrade you, attack you, etc. If either person in a relationship is not wanting to be in the relationship anymore, step away. If problems only get bigger and voices only get louder, it is time to go.

Brokenness can be re-shaped. You must be able to look within yourself and see your value and your worth (yes, the two are different). You have something special about yourself that cannot be taken away from you and that is what you must focus on when overcoming these abusive relationships.

You need to do something with your time that is productive. Get back in school, get a hobby, do volunteer work; do all of these things for yourself. You can heal inside, but it will take time. Yoga, meditation, silent retreats, sound psychological counseling, prayer, support groups, etc. can all be amazingly beneficial things for you to do. You have to do what works for you, and you do not need someone to do these things with you.

The most important thing for you to do after you have gotten away from your abusive past is to not look back. You left for a reason and you faced something that you should have never had to deal with. I know that there may be a lingering feeling trying to remember a piece of good/some happy memories, but I promise you it is not worth revisiting the pain.

You have a strength inside of yourself that you must tap into, and believe me you can do it.

The Universe nor God want you to endure abuse of any sort, so it is time to heal as best as you can.

Psalms 147:3
“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” You are hurting or you are still hurting, but know that there is a healing unlike any other coming your way. Seek help and pray about your situation. There is a better life/person for you. This wound needs more than a band-aid, this is definitely a surgery type of situation, so do what it takes to overcome and get stronger. God can heal you in a way that no other can; whatever higher power you connect to is with you and cares about you. You can look inside of yourself, gain wisdom/knowledge via teachings, meditation, and yoga to re-train your brain. Whatever way works for you, you need to do it starting right now.

Isaiah 40:29-31
“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” You will heal, with time and faith. It will take effort, simply waiting and believing will not get you out of your situation; you have to muster up the strength and reach inside of yourself to overcome abuse. Once you find that peace and your happiness, never let anyone take it away.

The truth of the matter is that yes you may currently be a victim, but you can become a survivor and a significant blessing with someone else, with new friends (or none at all) or by working elsewhere. You may feel weak right now but take it from a survivor-turned-warrior, you will find your strength.

Remember, you are not alone. I’ll listen to you, cry with you, pray with you, empower you, and help you in any way that I can.

Be blessed and be at peace.

#KayLasPositivityCorner

***Health Spotlight***
STD’s the prevalence of is increasing with time. Please remember that your body is your own and you have the option to say no and that is good enough; if someone sees a problem with that they can leave and you can tell them you are no longer interested. According to the CDC: there were approximately 2.3 million cases of chlamydia, gonorrhea & syphilis last year (more than 200,000) than the previous year. Get tested regularly, even if you are not in a relationship. There is free help at most community health clinics. Do not be scared to seek help, if you need it. You can experience many horrible symptoms and beyond if you do not get medical help. Protect yourself and others by doing the right thing.

Abuse, Empowerment, Epidemiology, Global Health, Healing, Overcoming, Public Health, Relationships, Strength

Overcoming Relationships of Every Sort

Posted on August 22, 2018September 24, 2020 by KayLa's Positivity Corner by KayLa N. Allen, MPH

©KayLaN.Allen

Throughout life, we meet and get to know people on many different levels.

The passing of time, change in vision of life, different goals, broken hearts, etc. can all be reasons that these relationship must come to an end.

Making the decision to overcome a relationship can be one of the most difficult things to do. However, this very decision can be one of the best things that you can do for yourself, your family, or your career.

Let’s look a little deeper at intimate relationships, friendships, and career relationships.

Intimate Relationships
When dating (typically at the beginning), many people experience feelings of joy, excitement, butterflies, love, lust, etc., but we must remember that those things don’t always last nor do they have to.

Of course, you should work hard in your relationships and love the one you are with, but if things have gone sour and either of you are experiencing dysfunction or unhealthy behaviors it may be beyond time to cut ties.

You know what you deserve in a relationship and what you need; if your significant other is unwilling to work on those things, don’t you think that maybe you need to rethink the relationship?

Don’t you think that maybe you should be with someone who is willing to put in the effort and build a strong, faithful, and loving relationship with you?

Let me say this: you do not have to stay with someone who cheats on you or mistreats you. You need to get your head on straight and think through your relationship and make the decision to overcome any negativity within it; if that means you need to leave, so be it.

Keep this at the forefront of your mind: staying in a relationship just for the kids will hurt you, your significant other, those God meant for you, and your children (as they will mimic and be susceptible to what you have shown them/allowed them to be a part of). Do the right thing.

Friendship
At various stages of our lives we meet people that we may find a connection with, someone that likes the same things, or someone that we simply have things in common with and they become friends that we hold close to our hearts.

We do things together, talk regularly, and even buy each other gifts. Those relationships are not always meant to travel with you for life, in fact it can be more unhealthy than anything to allow people that do not have the same goals, those without an aim for growth, or someone without the same beliefs as you.

Proverbs 18:24
“One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” A friend is a blessing, but sometimes you have to let them go so that you can grow and find your happiness. One of the greatest friends and the most dependable friend can be found in God.

Friendship is a beautiful thing, but sometimes those relationships are only for a season; you learn the lesson then it’s time to move forward. You must be willing to see through the memories, time spent, etc. and realize that growth and change are mandatory in life…even when it comes to friends. Overcome that relationship by realizing the value in it and remembering that your journey through life and your success do not require everyone that you encounter and/or befriend.

Career Relationships
A brand new job comes up and we get excited about it look forward to everything that we will do, etc. Over time, you may get bored, want more money, gain a degree, or get tired of the commute, etc. and that is perfectly fine. There are many people that stick to one job or one career for their entire life and that is okay, but that does not have to be the case.

If you are feeling stuck or unfulfilled and there is no room for growth, perhaps you need to overcome that career relationship. You need a challenge, you need to feel that you are making a difference and that you are being appreciated; if that is not how you feel you need to be appreciative of what you have learned and the opportunity and redirect your life.

Ecclesiastes 3: 1 & 5
“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing.” Knowing the value of any relationship (family included) is important, but it is equally important to recognize if someone/something is causing you to feel truly unhappy. If there is no way to mend it or the person is intentionally causing you emotional pain, you need to overcome that relationship.

It can hurt to leave people behind, but wouldn’t you rather forgive, try to mend, and overcome if it is necessary. You deserve to be happy within yourself; few things/people can give you that except God, looking into your soul, acknowledging what the Universe is blessing you with, and you.

Be blessed and be at peace.

#KayLasPositivityCorner

***Health Spotlight***
There have been over 100 measles cases and 8 outbreaks of the measles in the U.S. this year(CDC). The majority of people with measles contract it because they are not vaccinated. Physical symptoms may appear in about 10-14 days after exposure, but people are contagious after 4 days with the virus. Fever is the early symptom of the measles, they can reach up to 105 F; this is accompanied by malaise, cough, and conjunctivitis. The rash spreads from the head-down (CDC). High risk people are infants, adults over 20, pregnant women, and those with compromised immune systems. Airborne spread and droplets are the methods of transmission; it can remain in the air for two hours. There is no antiviral treatment, but medical care is necessary; hospitalization is hospital. As always, if you suspect an illness seek medical attention.

Labels: Overcoming, Growth, Relationships, Friends, Change, Empowerment, Epidemiology, Faith, Healing