Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

What we place meaning on will not always mean something to others, and that’s okay. 

On any given day, you decide to define your life, and that can include your values, traditions, clothing, culture and so much more. 

It can be difficult to focus on the things that mean something to you when you have fears, doubts, or concerns about how others carry what you are sharing with the world. 

The joy of your life comes from what you need and how you make it happen. 

If you’re carrying your culture in everything you do, remember that many people do not understand what you are doing or why you are doing it. 

There are many times when you will feel like someone’s thoughts will make you question everything that you are.

 When that happens, understand that you must stand strong and continue to be yourself. 

Take a moment to think about what means something to you, write it down, and take joy in being wonderfully you. 

Don’t change your values for anyone; enjoy the life that you lead.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters (circa 12/27/2020)

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that shares experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to reshape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves. Letters and other Dear Mixed Girl initiatives are also read aloud/shared online; check them out here.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. In these similarities, we can find individual truths and ways to become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth based on experiences and education and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact for those living the life of a “mixed” girl/woman.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs. Want to sign up as a coaching client or hire Dr. KayLa for a Dear Mixed Girl (trademark filed and pending) speaking engagement? Contact Dr. KayLa via the contact page and sign up below using the button to start the next part of your improved and embraced journey today.

Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

Do you understand the value and powerful potential that comes from learning and sharing your wisdom gained from overcoming challenges in your “mixed” journey? 

With every turn in the road and place where you find yourself growing and developing, you must learn something. 

There is no time in life when you have all the answers, but with a bit of support and dedication, there is a greater opportunity for smoother transitions and reached goals. 

Sometimes the missing piece to the puzzle of another person’s life is the moment of sharing that you can grant them from a meaningful place or space in time. 

Mixed girl, there are so many moments in your life where things may seem shaky, confusing, and difficult, but know that you will prosper. 

You have so many things you can give others in education and wisdom by repeatedly working through who you are and being the greatest version of yourself. 

There is hope in every today and promises in every tomorrow if you can remember to find the goodness around you and fight through the challenges that arise. 

Live through the fantastic value of who you are, and you will find that powerful way to give back to the world.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” letters, Letter Entitled “Sharing to Educate Others”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that shares experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to reshape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves. Letters and other Dear Mixed Girl initiatives are also read aloud/shared online; check them out here.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. In these similarities, we can find individual truths and ways to become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth based on experiences and education and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact for those living the life of a “mixed” girl/woman.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs. Want to sign up as a coaching client or hire Dr. KayLa for a Dear Mixed Girl (trademark filed and pending) speaking engagement? Contact Dr. KayLa via the contact page and sign up below using the button to start the next part of your improved and embraced journey today.

Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

What does it mean for you to take claim of the life that you lead without clinging on to what tried to hold you back? 

Surviving the challenges of being a mixed girl is nothing that should be ignored or erased, but there is a meaning behind that. 

You have to learn that there will be so many seasons of learning and overcoming in your mixed life, but you will have to continue to grow in your wisdom and truth to claim your identity in this world. 

You have to be able to move beyond surviving the pain of what was hurting you or what tried to break you.

There is nothing that you cannot face without a bit of patience, courage, and strength. 

You have a world of love that you can always tap into with no limits and no judgments – it even exists right here in these letters. 

You are amazing, and you can become the essence of the power of diversity, the push for equity everywhere you go, and the epitome of inclusion if you push to find value in your difficult moments.

There is nothing wrong with you, you are more than what you face, and you are magnificent inside and out…don’t stop now.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters, Letter Entitled “Surviving the Survivory of Your “Mixed” Life”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to reshape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves. Letters and other Dear Mixed Girl initiatives are also read aloud/shared online; check them out here.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individual truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth based on experiences and education and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact for those living the life of a “mixed” girl/woman.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs. Want to sign up as a coaching client? Contact Dr. KayLa via the button below and start the next part of your improved and embraced journey today.

Dear Mixed Girl


Do you know how much the world changes when parents understand their mixed child from the inside out at all phases of life? Many things will be faced as mixed people starting even before birth, and being prepared, educated, and aware can mean the difference between support being present and pain walking freely in. Now, there is no way to have all of the answers — understanding that the world is not kind and there will be a series of unfortunate events throughout a mixed person’s life is necessary for a parent to understand. This is a critical thing to realize before a child is brought into the world and throughout their entire life. Mixed girl, having that support and understanding of parents, guardians, godparents, etc., is essential, so don’t be afraid to speak up and share your truth. Parents (and those who guide and lead), it is your responsibility to learn, listen, and be there – it will not be easy (ever), but if you try to “get it” without judgment, your mixed child will be far better off. Understanding is not knowing exact feelings; it is putting yourself in a frame of mind to truly sympathize and empathize with another's heart, mind, and soul, and love makes this possible. Parenting a mixed child is an experience that is unlike any other, but if you are equipped to understand, engaged in educating yourself, and open to love through the pain and growth, it is a beautiful journey that will be a gift for everyone who will be directly and indirectly impacted.

Follow-Up Article Based on The “Dear Mixed Girl” Letter “Parents Who Understand”

Understanding Feelings

At the turn of every corner, so it will seem, a “mixed” child will have experiences ranging from identity concerns to being bullied for simply being who they are. As parents, caregivers, leaders, guardians, etc., you will have to understand what that means for the child, teen, young adult, etc., so that you can gather how that affect their feelings. These things that may seem minor in the moment can have a lasting imprint on a person’s life, especially if they are addressed and support in effective ways.

Understanding What The World Sees

To the world, a mixed person can be seen as beauty, evil, filthy, pride, privilege, and everything in between. Coupling any present issues of identity or lack of awareness within a child, there can be concerns that present themselves on the exterior as well. It is important to not only be aware of what the world sees, but know what that means for what will be face by a mixed person their entire life.

Preparing Your Mind and Heart For What Will Be Said

If you have a loved one in your life, a child, teen, or young adult that is “mixed” and of a diverse cultural/ethnic/racial background, your mind and heart need to be slightly on-guard, full of patience, and always ready prepared to listen with your heart. Pain inflicted with intent to someone who is simply being themselves can cut very deep; when you see or feel that pain in the sense of empathy, it may impact as well, but you must be prepared to offer support in whatever way is necessary and in order.

Leaving Judgment At The Door

No matter what a mixed person may express or share with you, you must leave any judgment at the door. Unless you have truly walked in their shoes, you will not fully understand what they are facing, and that is okay. You can try to get into a healthy mindset by being in-tune, educated, and emotionally enough to leave some of your biases behind. Jumping into attack or trying to speak about what you would have done or downplaying a situation that requires love and support will not help – just pay attention and seek outside assistance, as needed.

Being Dedicated To Helping Success and Happiness Be A Reality

Crafting a future is about a series of events lining up with grounded feet, wise counsel, personal transformation, emotional intelligence, internal joy, and sound awareness of identity (just to name a few things). When you are a part of shaping a mixed girl’s future, you must be dedicated to helping her find who she is and this takes a lot of work, dedication, and tailoring of a lifestyle. There is no one-size fits all and you will never have all of the answers. Being there to offer support and present how self-created success and happiness are possible, will make her life change forever, and that starts with how you show up.

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.

Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

How strong would you be willing to hold on to the person you know yourself to be? 

Give and take is how many things may work in life, but it does not have to be true for how you see and know yourself. 

You may see yourself fitting into many spaces because of your “vibe” and having different views or opinions, but this doesn’t mean you have to trade one part of yourself to fit into another space or place. 

Your identity and your freedom to be who you are within your culture, ethnicity, or race are not to be bargained with-you are for sale in any sense of the word.

If you understand that you are a treasure and your blended freedom to be all you are is golden, then you know that you cannot trade one part of who you are for anything else. 

There will not come a time when you have to become something you are not, so don’t think about what you must let go of. 

Stand strong in knowing who you are because you have no need to settle for the less than the fullness of that.

You are worthy of being all you are, and nothing is worth selling or trading your unique identity or freedom-not today, not ever. 

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled “What Do You Trade for Your Freedom or Identity?”

 

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.

Dear Mixed Girl

Do you know the value and beauty of the color of a mixed, loving relationship?

While you come from a combination of “color” and mixed racial/ethnic background, there is something so powerful and beautiful to recognize in that love. 

When we can love someone (in a “mixed” relationship) who may not look like us, that is wonderful, and it brings forth meaningful diversity and shared experiences at a different level. 

Recognize that you are a mixture of worlds, cultures, and loves that are limitless.

When you see the blood that comes out of your body, it is just as red as anyone else’s, right? 

You are no less than anyone else, nor are your parents or anyone you choose to love or spend your life with. 

Bringing together different perspectives, cultures, and lifestyles is how the world evolves and finds more ways to connect, so look at how amazing you are and how you are changing the world!

Whatever mixed relationship you may come from or create in the future, know that it is something beautiful, and it is to be appreciated for everything great that resides within it.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled “The Color of Your Loving Relationship”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.

Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

Do you know that what you face is not always something you asked for or something you have to welcome?

Seeing the world around you for what it is can be a challenge as a person from a mixed-race/multicultural background. 

Knowing that what you may see does not have to be a part of your world or your future is a challenge that you can tackle. 

War may arise around you, but you are armed with courage, greatness, and unique power unlike any other.

Your identity may trigger feelings, conversations, or behaviors in others that are negative, but you do not have to accept them. 

The choices that you make will shape who you are and what your future will be. 

You are wonderful, kind, beautiful, and a force to be reckoned with, so you do not have to accept any negativity that may arise around you.

No war that grows like weeds along your path and attacks your perception of your identity or sits amid your truth is incapable of being cut back or eliminated with the power of your mind, joy in your spirit, and love within your heart.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled “The War You Didn’t Welcome or Ask For”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.

Dear Mixed Girl

Is it easy to acknowledge that life can be a race to be won if you work together and someone is there to help you when you fall?

When you are learning to understand who you are or gathering strength within yourself, it may be challenging to do this yourself. 

If you have someone by your side who understands the depth of who you are, you can embrace a new you with your truth intact. 

There is no need to go through life alongside those who will not be in your corner and there to support you in your uniqueness.

Seek to share your journey and heart in vulnerable spaces with those who really care about you. 

If you cannot stand with someone, friends or loved ones, who care about you, stand firm in your truth and grow in spaces where you flourish. 

You have power and greatness within yourself and who you are.

How you run your race of life in all that you are while deciding who will be by your side and who will lift you up when you stumble or fall is your choice.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled “Your Two-Legged Race”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.

Dear Mixed Girl

Do you know that it is okay to embrace what is extremely different in your life or that of your family?

When something about you is different, it may feel like it would be easier to hide it or shelter yourself to protect what is meaningful to you. 

Understanding the truth of who you are, even if it did not exist in your family before you, is so important. 

If you hide something from others, you may be hiding your light, joy, and potential to be something amazing in the world.

Embracing what may seem like a “stain” in your life or identity is when you know that you can feel free to fly and be all that you are. 

Only others can taint and call something about you a stain because they do not know the powerful things that come together to make you who you are. 

Own the beauty of your differences, dear mixed girl, because you are so special in every way.

Love yourself for who you are and what makes you different because that is what will fill your life with unmistakable joy and lead you to much prosperity.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled “Hide Or Embrace A Stain On Your Life”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.

Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

Do you understand that you were molded in a unique way and you define the future of all you are? 

You are always growing and learning in all things that you do. 

When you think of how you are changing, you can choose to be clay and mold yourself along the way. 

If you approach your growth already formed as if you lack nothing, you will appear as though you’re a brick. 

You’re worth and value are far deeper than you may know, but how you approach life and learning is important. 

How you learn in your growth and journey will shape your future in every way. 

As you should be, clay that can be molded can be beautiful, strong, valuable, and cherished. 

Never stop challenging yourself and recall how you show up in life, as you always have a choice between being the “as-is” brick or being the valuable clay.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled “Be Brick or Clay”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.