When It Doesn’t Go As Planned

No matter how hard we try to accomplish business goals, many stops, trips, stumbles, and redirects will come about. You can have an endless number of dreams, goals, and aims in life, but this does not mean they will come to be. Surely, having reached all of our dreams by the end of our lives would be magnificent (so we think), but sometimes that is just not how things will pan out. What can you do when it doesn’t go as planned?

While with a strong aim to create my future and continue to access many opportunities, I recently came to a big halt right in the middle of the Detroit airport. You see, for months I had been churning away at trying to find wanted speaking engagements to participate in. I had a few that I had been welcomed into, and this particular merry-go-round was surely to be a place of great opportunity and equally awesome impact. I was supposed to be going to Madison, WV for an occupational therapy conference as a speaker. I had everything in order: flight booked, room reserved, transportation planned, etc. Even with everything situated, I did not make it to my destination. I did not take the time to see how the disarray that I was to face had slowly started to unravel from the beginning.

This is the part of the story where I tell you to make sure you are paying attention so you don’t miss what can be. While I had planned everything out, none of that process came with ease. In fact, I hit walls everywhere I was turning but still, I wanted to keep fighting the good fight. After a hugely delayed flight and a missed connection, I knew I was not making it to this conference. I was a crying mess, right there in the terminal and I didn’t care who would see my tears. From my loved ones, I got a little push of wisdom, from strangers I got a series of kind messages about my clothing, and for my own good, I took a moment to find a book to read to reframe my mindset. I started writing a letter to my present self about all I had recently overcome in this whirlwind of a week, and about how proud I was of myself for facing it all and working to overcome it. Then, I ran across a book that would change my life and I couldn’t be more grateful for that. It told me so much more about the power of not stopping and things to do to propel via positive, wanted, and forward momentum.

Life is a bit funny sometimes and it will test your patience, judge your character, and push you to limits that you did not even know existed. However, if you are willing to just take a look at the world around you, there will be a light just beyond the storm. I can see it right now. Give yourself a chance to understand that not everything is meant to be and yet, what is to be, will be. It almost sounds too simple, but it is more than true.

On the forever-winding road of entrepreneurship, things will not always go your way and life will not be perfect. Challenges happen and plans change. However, there is one guarantee in it, and that is, if you really want your dreams to come true, all it takes is one more step. Who knows (I do), what you really need could be just beyond your fears, storms, and hopes. So, why not just keep going?

I will be a part of the very small percentage of people who actually live out their dreams – how do I know this, because little by little, this is already in motion and I can see it. Besides, I already know God has a plan for me, and I know that in His time, it will all come to pass; that is as perfect as life gets. I will take the time to be okay with mistakes, redirects, and perceived failures because I know all of those things do not control my destiny or outcomes – they are just a part of a past moment in time and I am creating a multitude of moments that I can forever be proud of.

Plans may change and redirects may occur in your business growth and constant evolution, but will you be prepared to face yourself and your options in the process?

Take control of your business and personal growth while you co-create and manifest a desired future by working with Dr. KayLa today.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen is an International Motivational Speaker, Thought Leader, Transformational Coach – Certified Health and Well-Being Coach for Women, a Healthcare Leadership Development Consultant, a DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) Leader and Coach via Dear Mixed Girl, and an Expert on Shaping Thriving Futures. Learn more about her services and how you can begin your journey through business and personal evolution/personal development by clicking the button below.

Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

Do you understand the value and powerful potential that comes from learning and sharing your wisdom gained from overcoming challenges in your “mixed” journey? 

With every turn in the road and place where you find yourself growing and developing, you must learn something. 

There is no time in life when you have all the answers, but with a bit of support and dedication, there is a greater opportunity for smoother transitions and reached goals. 

Sometimes the missing piece to the puzzle of another person’s life is the moment of sharing that you can grant them from a meaningful place or space in time. 

Mixed girl, there are so many moments in your life where things may seem shaky, confusing, and difficult, but know that you will prosper. 

You have so many things you can give others in education and wisdom by repeatedly working through who you are and being the greatest version of yourself. 

There is hope in every today and promises in every tomorrow if you can remember to find the goodness around you and fight through the challenges that arise. 

Live through the fantastic value of who you are, and you will find that powerful way to give back to the world.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” letters, Letter Entitled “Sharing to Educate Others”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that shares experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to reshape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves. Letters and other Dear Mixed Girl initiatives are also read aloud/shared online; check them out here.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. In these similarities, we can find individual truths and ways to become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth based on experiences and education and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact for those living the life of a “mixed” girl/woman.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs. Want to sign up as a coaching client or hire Dr. KayLa for a Dear Mixed Girl (trademark filed and pending) speaking engagement? Contact Dr. KayLa via the contact page and sign up below using the button to start the next part of your improved and embraced journey today.

Women Are Powerful

There are countless things that a girl or woman can achieve when she has freedom, rights, access to education, and the ability to be herself. Am I right ladies?

There is no limit as to what/whom a become when she envelopes herself in what she is capable of doing, who she knows herself to be, and every effort to become a greater version of herself. 

Life, experiences, culture, society, trauma, negative “judgment” from others and so many other things can teach us as girls as=nd women false narratives about who we are, were, or what we can/cannot be. However, it is our job and forever mission to understand and work hard to start changing the world by working on ourselves and finding that true power that lives within.

No matter what you have heard or experienced, if you have not heard this before or lately, let me be the first to say that you are amazing. Don’t just take my word for it – the depth of women’s empowerment and what you need to get from it starts with the work you will do. Write it down and put it on everything that is to be in front of your face – your phone, computer, your mirror, etc. The first step to your forever greatness starts now. 

Girls who see great women, learn from wise females, and are encouraged to be amazing as they are will flourish in every way possible. This is one of the best gifts that you can give – girl’s empowerment, especially when it is based on what you have learned and grown through.

Only when we can silence the doubts, be happy with who we are, and appreciate the strength in our voices can we make a difference in the world around us. We are all responsible for leaving a legacy behind, shaping history, and helping others rise; women, work hard for that starting by transforming yourself

Every day, you must ask yourself, “What can I do to make the most of today?” The answer to this question is not all about a task, it is about how you will treat yourself for the best version of your present and the future you aim to have.

While we do not have the answers to why things may not be perfect or easy from day to day, we do know that as women we can do anything that we work hard for and aim to do. 

If someone could examine the most common character descriptions of women, they would include words like strong, overcomers, highly capable, dedicated, diligent, wise, empathetic, emotional at times, intelligent, and compassionate beyond words. 

Never lose sight of who you are, what peace you can bring, are what you are capable of achieving. Look around you, seek guidance, wisdom, and support, and tap into your power especially when you are feeling down, doubtful, or confused.

Know that the reflection looking back at you in the mirror is so much more than what you have experienced, what you physically see, or what others may say. You are powerful, capable, and amazing! Never forget it.

Women’s empowerment is a tool and girl’s empowerment is a guide, but both start inside and blossom into something that can change the world!

Be blessed and be at peace.

-KayLa’s Positivity Corner by Dr. KayLa N. Allen

Dr. KayLa N. Allen is a Doctoral (DHA) Candidate, International Motivational Speaker, Thought Leader, Transformational Coach – Certified Health and Well-Being Coach, and Expert on Shaping Thriving Futures. Learn more about her services and how you can begin your journey through business and personal evolution by clicking the button below.

 

 

Setting Your Sights

Being able to view what you want is how you may be able to approve what you see into the vision set before you.

A set sight of destruction or a belief that has come from fear or doubt will be met with challenges.

A path of confusion or mismanagement may lead to a season of blundering.  Wandering around looking at a little of this and a little of that, stepping off of the path because something sounded nice or looked pretty, etc. may not be the wisest thing to do. You need a little bit of target practice!

There are no challenges that will be unmet. The real challenge is how you will show up and address what is before you.

Willfully centering yourself is when you shift from a level of clarity to a level of positioned elevation. 

When was the last time strategically focused on then released that which you really wanted? This practice may sound crazy or a bit ridiculous, but it is the reality of creating a vision and manifesting something by embodying what you really want.

Where is your sight set? If seeing something that may not be within reach at the moment without a few steps before it, you may need to re-adjust your plan. If you are thinking about things that are of your past and they no longer align with who you are today, you have some deep thinking to do about why this may be and what you need to do to get yourself back in “working order”. 

Are you thinking about success? Success is defined by only you, so if you have levels of success be mindful of how you may be addressing them with yourself at the core of it. Remember that when you are aiming for success, you are doing things for more than yourself. I always remind myself that God gave me the gift of who I am and what I am supposed to do so that I can bless others – that is powerful, and I am thoroughly grateful for it.

Are you only imagining possibilities? If the intention is to focus, how can you do so if there are only moments of daydreaming, hoping, or imagining. Surely, there must come a time when strategies, goals, seeking wise counsel, and making a plan must come into play.

Whatever your sights may be set on now, know that what you want in the future will depend on the building blocks you see right now.

Set your sights on a plan and be willing to gently shift so that you can clearly see what is there waiting for you.

Be blessed and be at peace.

-KayLa’s Positivity Corner by Dr. KayLa N. Allen

Dr. KayLa N. Allen is a Doctoral (DHA) Candidate, International Motivational Speaker, Thought Leader, Transformational Coach – Certified Health and Well-Being Coach, and Expert on Shaping Thriving Futures. Learn more about her services and how you can begin your journey through business and personal evolution by clicking the button below.

Try Now, Not When

Having goals is a wonderful thing, but if you find yourself constantly telling yourself that you will get to something or you will start something when you have accomplished something, you may miss out on something wonderful right now. Perfection may sound great and it may seem tangible, but it is neither practical or necessary when you have your purpose and passion intact.

Why is it that we tell ourselves that we must be perfect, 100% ready, in an ideal place, complete, fully accomplished, etc. to get something done? Who said to you in some space or time that you needed to seek perfection in who you are or what you do at all times?

A road of trying with some imperfections or incomplete “tasks”, could lead to positive outcomes, whereas not trying at all will lead to a dead end. 

Belief in yourself is one thing that you must hold onto when you think that you have to know all of the answers.

Belief in yourself is one thing that you must cherish when you do not understand how your dream will come to fruition, even though you putting in the necessary work right now.

Belief in yourself is what you can also hold in your heart and mind when doubts arise, fears are in the midst of your plans, and hopelessness tries to seep into your world.

There is nothing that you cannot obtain with some imperfections, flaws, “failures”, and stumbles as you try to make your dreams a reality with logic and wisdom in your toolbox. You must always believe in yourself, first and foremost.

Ladies, if you are not in a place financially where you can afford designer labels or high end clothing that you may desire, there are many things that you can do to shop on a dime and still look great. Ask me how I know… 🙂  I love a great thrift store find! Do well with what you have, and be beautiful from the inside out! People cannot deny your light.

People, if you are scared to try something new because you haven’t completed your degree or you don’t have a formal college education, and you think that no one will hear you or respect you, start off small and use what you have living inside of you. You can do a lot by just being the current and best version of yourself!

There is nothing that cannot be done without a bit of faith, hope, and a lot of effort – notice that I did not say perfection. You do not have to be perfect to accomplish anything.

Do not believe that any journey accomplished started off with 100% perfection or ease.

Speaking from experience, many people are not handed anything. I can guarantee you that if you are reading this and the message is hitting home for you, that most of the people in your circle had to work very hard to get where they are.

I was handed nothing. I had to fight for and work hard for everything that I have earned. If this sounds like you, in this, it is an amazing thing because no one can ever take your efforts, title, letters, degrees, etc. away from you. Now is your time to make the most of what you have. You must hold your head high and be proud of what you have accomplished, as it is no minor miracle that you have done what you done to make it to this great space in your life.

You are not walking on this Earth and living and breathing in your purpose to be someone else. You are to fit into someone’s timeline or description of your identity. 

Any idea of how things must be or thoughts on perfection, if they were placed into your mind by anyone or anything, that is something that you need to evaluate and walk yourself through, because this is not reality and it is certainly not you.

If you have a dream, vision, or something that you want to do – make it happen!

What’s wrong with being brave from time to time? What would happen if you stepped out on a little bit faith or a little dose or hope and you ended up changing the life of one person? Now what would happen if you didn’t try?

Start getting in the habit of telling yourself to try now and not when…

Try being a little unstoppable (over and over again) and tell me how things turn out.

Be blessed and be at peace.

-KayLa’s Positivity Corner

Dr. KayLa N. Allen is a Doctoral (DHA) Candidate, International Motivational Speaker, Thought Leader, Transformational Coach – Certified Health and Well-Being Coach, and Expert on Shaping Thriving Futures. Learn more about her services and how you can begin your journey through business and personal evolution by clicking the button below.

 

Dear Mixed Girl

Is it easy to acknowledge that life can be a race to be won if you work together and someone is there to help you when you fall?

When you are learning to understand who you are or gathering strength within yourself, it may be challenging to do this yourself. 

If you have someone by your side who understands the depth of who you are, you can embrace a new you with your truth intact. 

There is no need to go through life alongside those who will not be in your corner and there to support you in your uniqueness.

Seek to share your journey and heart in vulnerable spaces with those who really care about you. 

If you cannot stand with someone, friends or loved ones, who care about you, stand firm in your truth and grow in spaces where you flourish. 

You have power and greatness within yourself and who you are.

How you run your race of life in all that you are while deciding who will be by your side and who will lift you up when you stumble or fall is your choice.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled “Your Two-Legged Race”

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.

Remain In Character

Do you know who you are?

Okay…do you know who you are around your family and friends?

Well…do you know who you are in business spaces?

Let me ask again, do you really know who you are?

If your answer to those questions shifted in extreme ways, you may need to do a little reflecting on the role you are playing in your life.

As an individual that is choosing to evolve your life consistently, you are leading in a way that many people never do, do not know how to do, or they think they do not have to do. No matter what type of leader you may be, your good character is of added value to what you do and for the growth of others, so it must be appreciated – that starts with you.

Value of yourself starts inside as does your identity, character, and sense of worthiness. While elements of you should adjust slightly depending on what you are facing, your character should not change.

When faced with life, your well-being, or anything that is at the center of your universe you must recall who you are and there is no room for you to change that definition for the sake of others.

If you do not remain in your true character amongst others and choose to play a role, you will not succeed and will not look the same as what you see in the mirror. The things that you want to have in your life and in what you do will only be possible if you are tapped into who you are, and you are elevating the power of yourself inside and out.

Conforming to meet a standard or become what you think others want to see in you will only give you what others want. True success and happiness are things that only you can grant yourself. So, if you are detached from the truth how can walk in your truth and be a beacon on light in the spaces that only you can walk in?

Your awareness of self and your well-being play a significant role in becoming the next version of yourself, so they must be in alignment. Do you understand what that really means? There are no changes to your heart and soul that must be changed if you are being a good person and you are staying along the path that you want to be on. 

Only when you add a bit of sparkle and strength to the truth of your greatest self while honoring how hard you are working in your evolution, can you become success in a sustainable manner.

Seasons change and your mindset should as well, but you as a whole must remain the same at heart. People will love and cherish you for you. Keep working hard, learning, leveling up, and loving yourself, it will all pay off. 

Be blessed and be at peace.

-KayLa’s Positivity Corner by Dr. KayLa N. Allen

Dr. KayLa N. Allen is a Doctoral (DHA) Candidate, International Motivational Speaker, Thought Leader, Transformational Coach, and Expert on Shaping Thriving Futures. Learn more about her services and how you can begin your journey through business and personal evolution by clicking the button below.

 

Strength Is Tough

Finding your way through difficult situations and maintaining a sense of strength within yourself takes strength, but it is tough in more than one way.

Completing a task or making something happen is only one part, the external part, of creating a reality. 

Some of the most difficult work to be done happens within yourself when strength may not be enough to get something done.

Things that are worth having and things that you really want in life will not fall into your lap with ease. 

You will be met with tears, trips and falls, lies and false judgment, naysayers, bias, and everything in between when you are trying to do great things and be a good person.

Strength is not something that is only important from a physical standpoint; it must be developed from the inside out if you aim for it to hold a lasting and meaningful value.

You are a multifaceted person that has been met with many sets of circumstances, obstacles, and missions throughout your life, so how could your element of strength be one dimensional? It isn’t. There are many parts to it.

Your strength requires you to be a whole person. You must be working on your health from the inside out. You must understand that you will not always be working from a place of 100% and that is okay just as well.

Being strong is a part of who you are, it is not an identity, so keep that in mind.

No matter what you may face in life, your strength may need to be present so that you can accomplish your goals but that does not mean that you cannot be gentle, human, or “soft” at times.

Be yourself. Be patient. Practice self-empathy. Work hard to find the balance that you need in your life, and you will walk into the life that you deserve.

Life will be met with trials and storms, but you will be the determining factor in how your strength will show up.

Even if the odds seem like they are stacked against you or if many things seem to be going terribly wrong, one thing is for sure, you are so much stronger than you think. 

Be blessed and be at peace.

-KayLa’s Positivity Corner

Dr. KayLa N. Allen is a Doctoral (DHA) Candidate, National Motivational Speaker, Thought Leader, Transformational Coach, and Expert on Shaping Thriving Futures. Learn more about her services and how you can begin your journey through business and personal evolution by clicking the button below.

Don’t Sway In The Wind

Being a stronghold in your world as life switches, twists, and turns is a valuable and key part of becoming successful and the next version of who you are supposed to be.

Getting caught in the wind and flowing with the breeze, no matter which way it may turn, is not only going to deter your path, but it may also stop you from reaching your destination.

Having your feet firmly planted in life can be difficult, but readjusting when that difficulty arises may be the key to ensuring your next steps can be taken.

When life is grand and simple, we can run, skip, jump, and maybe twirl along the path because there may not be any obstacles along the way. In this space, enjoy every moment and take advantage of the opportunities set before you. There will be many times like this, and it is up to you to acknowledge that you have this exceptional and rare time in front of you. 

However, when life is not so easy, you must remember that you are in control even still.

For me, God is the stronghold in my life and always will be. Many times, I could have rolled along like tumbleweed or swayed in the wind like a tree in the forest, but I didn’t do that. I understood that God had something greater for me, so I could not walk in that path because if I did, I could not become who I am now nor who I am called to be. 

Swaying in the wind not only affects you, it affects everyone and everything around you. 

Always know that you are a person, being, entity, brand, and visionary that is Earth-shaking, life-changing, and a gift to so many people if only you tap into and hold firm to everything that makes you who you are and multiply that times infinity.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen is a Doctoral (DHA) Candidate, National Motivational Speaker, Thought Leader, Transformational Coach, and Expert on Shaping Thriving Futures. Learn more about her services and how you can begin your journey through business and personal evolution by clicking the button below.

 

Dear Mixed Girl

Dear Mixed Girl,

How do you focus on your goals and keep going forward when you think the odds are stacked against you? 

We, as mixed girls, can sometimes go through life being told that because we are different, there will be nothing that we can do that will be easy. 

We can also be told that everything will come to us without problems. 

Both of those statements have no actual validity, and it is up to you to know that if you want to reach your goals, you must stay focused and check off your list as you move forward. 

No one can tell your story or dictate your life and what it is made of except you. 

The challenges that you overcome, the methods in which you strive for greatness, the courage that you house inside your DNA are to be understood by you and only you. 

In life, one of your greatest missions is to recall who you are at your core, no matter what you face or what goals you aim to achieve. 

Bind your passion to your goals and let nothing that holds no real value break your focus because you are worth far more than that.

-Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s “Dear Mixed Girl” Letters

Letter Entitled: “Goal List – Check Off and Keep Going”

 

The “Dear Mixed Girl” letters are a series from Dr. KayLa N. Allen that share experiences, motivation, and compassion. These letters are linked to the “Dear Mixed Girl, What is Your Identity?” coaching program. Other related messaging that Dr. KayLa creates is to re-shape the way that mixed girls and women think about themselves and how they contribute to the world by being themselves.

No “mixed” experience is the same, but many parts of the biracial/multi-ethnic experience are similar. It is in these similarities that we can find individuals truths and ways in which we can become the best version of ourselves regardless of what the world may show us.

Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s greatest hope is to share with others her truth and what lives inside of her so that there can be sustainable changes and powerful impact in those living the life of a “mixed” girl.

If you or the mixed girl in your life felt the impact of this letter, read more empowering messages and find out how you can transform yourself, be proud of who you are, and lead a unique and joyful life via Dr. KayLa N. Allen’s coaching programs.