Advice from the right spaces, time, and people can lessen the load of life, decrease stress, and generate levels of wisdom that would have taken much more time. One thing that people often do is place themselves in situations where they are sharing their struggles and getting advice from people who do not have the experiences or wisdom to truly help them. Have you ever shared a little too much with someone and quickly realized that it was a mistake? I have.
Sharing yourself with someone that you trust is one of the greatest parts of life. However, when this is done in ignorance, naivety, or a rush, it can be detrimental.
In business, if you seek assistance or mentorship from a leader that does not practice what they preach, there will be unseen struggles that will arise. A title does not always equate to competence or proof of concept. See, often people find themselves in a heap of mess because they sought advice from someone who did not have similar experiences.
When you are looking for a coach or mentor, you need to be sure that the wisdom, messaging, and teachings that you are to receive come from a place of authenticity and proven practices that are rooted in evidence-based practices.
About two years ago I found myself at a national conference and I connected with someone that I thought would be an excellent mentor. Her business track record was phenomenal, and her expertise was undeniable. One thing that I did not question was her character and motives. WHAT A MISTAKE! She fed me lies, set me up for failure, and dished out more broken promises than I can count. If I would have begged her to take me under her wing (which she had already said she did), I would have been so disappointed. I gave it a short amount of time and then came to the realization that she really didn’t care, and it was all for show!
When people do not share your experiences, understand where you come from, or have the proof that they have already overcome the things that you are facing, how can they be added value to your life? This is not to say that people cannot be genuinely empathetic. People can try to understand and try to relate, but there is much to be said about showing the fruit of your labor. If you find that you need advice for anything in your life, don’t just turn to the first open mouth, listening ear, or shoulder to cry out. Do you work and make good decisions that will benefit your future.
Be blessed and be at peace.